August 5th, 2001


On Megatokyo, bishonen, and my art style...

When I first met Kelsey, she told me my art reminded her of Megatokyo. While I was somewhat flattered because the art is of fairly high, fairly consistent quality and somewhat amazed to find someone else in summer school who read online comics, it did then and continues to disturb me that if someone draws anime online, it is usually automatically assumed that they love Megatokyo and want to be another Piro. (Kelsey did NOT assume this, btw, merely saying that most people I've talked to online do... yeesh)
I don't want to be another Piro. Or the next Poe. Or a new Tycho or Gabe. I want to be the first Jenni. I want to have my own, recognizable style. I want to have people trying to be the next me. I want them to love my characters and empathize with them as much as I do.. which means I want my audience to suffer, but that's another story. While I'm at it, I'd also like a pony.

Michael is complaining (loudly) that I'm drawing Kaen too girly.
Michael, dear... have you seen the majority of the men I draw? Many would think they're women... Even the ones with short hair are disturbingly pretty. I've tried to get away from this, but it's difficult. Very, very difficult. *sigh*
A lot of it is merely in the translation of the character... Michael has a very hard, sketchy, angular style to his drawings.. and I can't draw a straight line to save my life. all my lines are curvy and flowy - which tends to lend itself to the characters also being curvy and flowy. Kaen is suppoesd to be good-looking, but not pretty. >_< problem is, with me, it tends to be one and the same... urk!

*sigh* damned college admissions... *brainstorms*

dammit. I really gotta do these essays. Have I mentioned how much I suck at essays? I suck greatly. I just never have that much to say. Maybe it's because I'm not really interested in much anymore. Used to be I could work up a good rant, at least, over almost anything. Now one-word answers are more my thing.

Okay, gonna BS these stupid things if I have to. Chances are I won't get in anyway, so I guess it doesn't matter. I think I'm just going to get all the initial sarcasm out here...

Topic B - Personal Essay 2
Describe and evaluate one experience that significantly influenced your academic interests. The experience might be a high school course, a job, a relationship, or an extracurricular activity. Be sure to explain how this experience led to your setting the goals you now have for yourself, and why you think the academic program for which you are applying will help you to reach those goals.

... academic interests? I have no academic interests. Oh well, I can always make some up. Let's see here...
High school course that taught me something relevant to my future... nope, I don't think my school offers those.
Job? It taught me that I am not a real artist, but I can pretend to be one for long enough to help people pick out gesso. It also taught me that I am a human doormat (according to one manager, who thought I was far too nice to the other cashiers, letting them leave first, stay away from their registers, etc.).
Relationship? Don't make me laugh. Whatever weird relationships (be they romantic or otherwise) I've had have taught me that humanity usually isn't something worth having faith in.
Extracurricular activities... Hmmm.... Band... er... NO... it taught me that I don't really get along well in the whole "social" thing... Art... uh... I remember my dad saying that after all, I wasn't good enough to make it as a commercial artist (if I hadn't been thinking the exact same thing, that might have hurt my feelings. As it was, it just became further proof that I should not do art)... The Internet... hmmm... dorky and stupid though it sounds, that may actually be the only thing I can write about. Maybe something about how I saw webpages that looked really nice and thought "I want to do that"... and much as I did with writing and drawing, I proceeded to do so. I can say something about wanting to learn how computers work. (actually, most of the time, I'm afraid of my computer because it keeps saying it's going to destroy me... 0.0;; but they don't need to know that...)

*sigh* *writes*

(no subject)

Well, Nicole and I called Michael to see if he wanted to come over and watch The Crow with us (Nicole just loves Michael, amazingly enough. She thought someone I was that sweet on must be boring, but she founf out that - HAH! - he is quite interesting), but Michael was gonna watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon instead. So Nicole is probably going to invite Dustin over here to watch Billy Madison while I retreat with my beloved Crow. I love that movie. ^_^