August 11th, 2001


*piddles around with notepad*

this'll be a song for TBA ('nother comic). The main character in the comic, Ana, writes it about an old boyfriend.

I don't love you anymore
I don't miss you anymore
I don't miss your stubbornness
I don't miss being stubborn back at you
I don't miss your know-it-all attitude
I don't miss how you really did know everything
I don't miss you frustrating way of arguing with me
I don't miss making up afterward
I don't miss the way you always get the last word
I don't miss that it was always "I love you"
I don't miss the way you felt like you had to protect me
I don't miss the way you always looked out for me
I don't miss the way you never showed emotions
I don't miss the way you let no one else see you cry
I don't miss seeing you smile
I don't miss your random habits
I don't miss the way you wake me up to say "I love you"
I don't miss your snoring
I don't miss the way you look when you're asleep
I don't miss the sound of your voice
I don't miss the way you sing in the shower
But most of all...
I don't miss the way you loved me
and I don't miss being so happy....

blech, sucky poetry... *scampers away*

My baby's in the hospital...

... er... I mean, my car's in the shop. 9_9;;

battery died. Or so I thought - turns out the battery was a bit low, but there was something going on with the alternator. @_@ oh how I wish I knew something about cars. That's really something I need to do - learn how to fix my car.

On the other hand, my baby comes home in about half an hour (so maybe there wasn't something too majorly wrong), so wheeee! :D

Lets... go to... the Movies!

Nicole and Kelly are making a movie. e-O
it's a New Age Drama (i.e. pointless genre they came up with as an excuse for why this three-and-a-half minute cinematic disaster has NO plot) about them trying to be dramatic, realizing they have no problems, and then just wandering around for a while. They break the fourth wall a couple of times, have a few scenes in my car where they supposedly learn to drive (meep!) and I wanted them to add in a small feud over a boy, but all the guys they know are out of town. I suggested Michael, but (a) they don't really want to fight over Michael, and (b) he probably wouldn't do it. Funny though it would be... *ponders*

hmmmmm (ramblings)

I was just browsing through Legendary and thinking (never a good thing; I think too much sometimes).

Legendary does a lot of the stuff I had hoped to do with my comics, Second Arrival in particular and, lately, Cybergenesis 3 as well. It features multimedia such as music, flash animation, and some lovely art. The only problem is...
I work alone.
-_-; this is going to cause me so many problems and I know it'll be the reason I can never do anything with my work, but the fact remains: For the most part, if you want me to do something with any degree of artistic efficiency, I work alone. Yes, I work on CG3 with Michael, but as I believe I've mentioned, most of the time he acts mostly as an editor. We RPd the story enough for me to (hopefully) get enough of a feel for most of the characters to write decently for them, and any questions I have, I bring to him. I also love him enough that, despite the fact that he edits my work, I don't have an urge to kill him (I loathe editing. Short of spelling checks, I absolutely despise it. If I wanted it to be different, I would have written it that way in the first place. Yeah, I'm a bitch. Don't fuck with my work.) Usually, instead of editing, I have too many things that I want to change, so I simply redo the whole project. This has been evidenced in many of my comics, most notably in CG3 and SA, which have seen no less than 5 drawn/written versions apiece, not to mention T-893, an old, old story of mine that has been rewritten so many times that the first version and the current one don't even appear to be the same story.
But if you take a look at Legendary, you can see (it's evident in the artwork, at the very least) that a LOT of people put their work into this project. And I just couldn't do that. There's simply no way I could:
(A) Ask people to put as much thought and work into my project as I do - at least not without pay. And how the hell am I gonna pay a staff of professional animators? (go with amateurs, you say - but I've seen amateur work, and without insult intended to any animators out there because I know it's HARD AS HELL, a lot of stuff done by people who aren't used to it is, well, crap. The stuff I make is crap (there's a reason you've not seen it). And I won't be happy until it portrays exactly what I have in mind.
(B) Find enough people who draw the same style I do, or who are good enough copycat artists to fake it. While Legendary's art is usually quite good, it's very very obvious that it was done by many different artists with quite different styles, making it look almost like a compilation of fan art done as a tribute to an established series. Does that make sense? Some of the pictures are really high quality, some have excellent coloring, but the line art needs work, some have issues elsewhere; there's no consistency in the quality and form of the work and that would bother me way too much. Once I got used to it, it didn't bother me at all - while I was watching/reading. But if it were my own creation, I think I'd rather not see seventeen different versions of Kenji in the same animation.
(C) Find music I like for the background. The likelihood that I would be able to find bands whose music works, who would allow me to use their music is slim. Besides.. back to that old habit of "I'll do it myself, dammit!" It's times like this that my complete inability to write music really haunts me. I know what kind of music should be in the background because I know what's going on in the character's minds, whether the audience does or not, and that can make the difference between the readers/viewers figuring out a scene and simply sitting there going "huh?". I'm doing my damndest to work with a few different music programs to try to compose something worth putting to use, but it's very hard for me.

*sigh* but I would really really love to do animation. I would be overjoyed to be able to make a short film with SA or CG3, or ML, (particularly ML right now, since it's the only one really up) but it would require more time than I have. To me, animation is like acting, only with more freedom of expression. Perhaps that's why I love it so much.

But I will try, dammit. Mark my words. I will try.
  • Current Music
    Jessica Riddle - Even Angels Fall