The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain (jenni_the_odd) wrote,
The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain
jenni_the_odd

  • Mood:

Fucknuggets.

As our last real assignment in English (since our teacher is not stupid enough to attempt to make a bunch of second-semester seniors who have already taken the AP in her subject if they chose to do so do any actual work) we are to give a three-minute speech on how high school has affected us.

... I am trying very, very hard to think of something that won't land me in the counselor's office. I mentioned this, and Alan, who doesn't even know me all that well, turned and agreed wholeheartedly. I have changed so much. Particularly in the last two years. Especially this year. Mostly for the worse.

I lost a lot of things. My blind faith in religion. My trusting nature. My love of learning. My love of people and social situations. My fear of being alone. A lot of weight. My ability to look in the mirror and not want to claw my eyes out because I hate what I see just that much. My artistic drive. My passion for music. My sense of self-worth.
Those who knew me then and know me now might say 'my mind'.

... thinking too much depresses Jenni. How depressed? I just made myself something involving coffee and (gasp!) chocolate. Calories be damned. *siiiiiip*
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