I am not in the mood to be inspired/uplifted.
1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
You make me feel so superior!
2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
They'll skip right over 'crying' and go directly to 'suicide'...
3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
It could also mean they hate you!
4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
... through the gaping hole in your chest that they first ripped open with their bare hands
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
... nope, no way to corrupt this. It's pretty true...
6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Nor do you know who's staring at that piece of spinach between your teeth
7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
To the rest of us, you're "That creepy person who should be shot"
8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
You will have a lot of time on your hands.
9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
Or maybe God just wants us to think this, so the sadistic bastard can have a good laugh at our miserable little expense
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
That way, when you mow them down with your semi-automatic, it will take them completely by surprise. They never suspect the happy ones.
11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
...this won't stop them from hurting you, it'll just hurt more each time. Bitch.
12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
Because then at least you will understand why they hate you and want you to die.
13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
And it's not like you'd succeed anyway.