The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain (jenni_the_odd) wrote,
The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain
jenni_the_odd

This made me giggle. A lot.

And, because I know something like 40% of the people who read this bloody thing are LOTR slashfans... Er... yah.

Am debating whether or not studying more for Bio is worth it. On one hand, a good final exam grade never hurt anyone. On the other, given my grades, there is no way even a perfect score on the final will make it acceptable. I shall be taking it again. Rrgh.
I really, honestly and truly loathe sciences. I cannot stay focused on the words on the page and after a while it all starts swimming and I forget how to read. I hate it when I forget how to read. But yes, the sciences and I have a strong mutual dislike thing going on. I've never been very good at them. Nor really good at the liberal arts, either. I've yet to turn in anything to any English teacher that I was actually proud of writing. I did tolerable in music and I did quite well in art, but then again the last time I was in an art class you were graded on how well you avoided eating the paint.

All my life I have been told that I am 'intelligent', 'gifted', etc. When I apply myself and am decently pleased with my results, I get lousy marks. This leads me to believe that everyone who has ever complimented me is full of shit and is far too stupid to be allowed to breed. When I do not apply myself, I get either good grades or abysmal ones. This leads me to believe that something is not right. The fact that I have entirely ceased caring is not helping much either.

Hrm. If my GPA is to survive, next semester will most likely result in my online (i.e. on any sort of message program) times becoming something very tiny. Or possibly nonexistant. That might be a nice break. And not going to Houston much. I still don't think I should have gone home for Thanksgiving, but there's nothing I can do about that now. By my nature I am an all-or-nothing person in most things I do. Looks like studies need to become the 'all', and talking to people the 'nothing'.
Of course, this will not happen.
As they did the last time I attempted to cease communication, people will whine because they use how often they are spoken to as a measure of how much they are loved. I cannot blame them for this, as it is a common thing. We all have at one time or another used 'the silent treatment' to inform people that we don't particularly care for them at the moment.
And of course there is the simple fact that I will miss some people. *gasp* y'know, boyfriend and whatnot.

*sigh* Why am I doing this?
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