Elves are intrinsically gay. They reproduce by laying Fabergé eggs that hatch into medieval interior decorators and hairdressers. There's no suspense.
That made me giggle.
In other, more frightening news, I'm turning into my mother. I have this obsessive NEED to vaccuum everywhere, mop the kitchen floor, and generally make everything sparkly before I leave.
If I start making wreaths and decorating with bunnies, SHOOT ME.