The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain (jenni_the_odd) wrote,
The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain

"...does it count as homosexual if I'm attracted to my own butt?" - feyr

No, I did not die. I just didn't post for a few days. Admittedly, that IS rare. If ever I go a week or more without posting for no easily deduced reason (i.e. no last post saying "I'm laying off LJ for a while..." etc.), assume I am dead and contact the proper authorities. Otherwise, no one would notice until I began to reeeeally smell.

My baby is in the hospital (read: car is in the shop). *snif* I miss my baby. Yes, my car is my best friend. Shaddup.

I think the best Stupid Porn Spam Title I've ever gotten, to date, is:
"Captain Jenni's Anal Adventures"
I have not laughed so hard in some time.
It also makes me think of this.

Despite the title of this entry, there will, sadly, be no hot hot mansex involving Kevin and some other guy dressed as pirates, because the prospect causes him to make this face. lepetitemort, emperor_boy, and myself are all deeply disappointed. Yet very amused by that face.

I have made an wish list (and the book previously linked is on it), and for that, I am going to hell. At least I am too stupid to figure out how to link to it, or I might actually be tempted to post said link and go "BUY ME STUFF PLZ KTHX", and then I would have to shoot myself in the knees. And I'd like to keep my knees. They're useful buggers.

Keywords: Hentai Hat
This is, well, the Hentai Hat. I think it's pretty obvious. Taken on Valentine's Day. My hair was frizzy, my face was broken out, and I'd been up all night, but it's the HAT that truly matters.
Default Keywords: me
Drawn with a mouse on the Ancient Computer that is Now Dead. I have been told it actually looks something like me (except for the notable lack of double-chin. How I loathe my neckfat. Though the word 'neckfat' is fun to say. Neckfat. Heee!) You can't see it due to the fact that I shrunk the picture muchly to make it look good and function as an icon, but there is a glittery vine on the corner of my eye.
Keywords: Crow
I ♥ the undead. I do. I don't know why.
Keywords: I eat babies
I had the page it came from bookmarked, it was some mediocre japanese artist's site, but I've now lost it. As soon as I can draw something that cute, I'll switch this icon for something I've made myself. The puppy is just too damned cute. It must be evil.
Keywords: Sparky the Dancing Crack Owl!
The first animation I ever made, shrunk to icon size. I actually rescanned the original pictures (each drawn and watercolor penciled by hand) to make it an icon, since the original .gif was too big. Everyone likes Sparky, except for neonid, who is a poo-head. But we love him anyway. "we" being myself and the little man who lives in my thumb.
Keywords: I gnaw on your head!
Me, gnawing on Nicole's head. When I attempt to do this in real life, she beats me.
Keywords: trying to kill you with my mind
Now, really, who HASN'T tried this? I was very disappointed to discover it didn't work. Maybe if someone douses me in animal guts and blood I'll be able to kill them with my thoughts, but until then, it's good a old-fashioned crowbar-to-the-head for me.
Keywords: Snaily! (photo courtesy of minnaloushe)
Snaily! Photo by minnaloushe, who takes some of the best photos EVER. Snails make me happy.
Keywords: scary puppy eyes!
I don't like this one so much, and will probably be replacing it eventually. Matt making his Scary Sad Puppy Eyes. Then he gets stuck like that. Concept is mildly amusing, text is a bit small.
Keywords: pretty face
Because, like Dana, I HATE being told I "have a pretty face". Because the unsaid (or, often, said) statement that follows is "... it's such a shame you're so fat". From this icon, as you might have noticed, Dana eventually hears it one time too many and decides no, she will NEVER have a pretty face. Since she hates blood, once she snaps out of it and realizes what she's done, she freaks out. Interesting spot in the story, that. I messed with the actual lineart in photoshop, and her lips look weird... her eye is also too far over and a bit too small for her. Dammit. Now i'm compelled to make this one over, also...

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