The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain (jenni_the_odd) wrote,
The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain
jenni_the_odd

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I'm still alive, I swear! I'm just whiny!

I do, however, feel like poo on a stick. Which many of you will recognize as being the worst kind of poo.

I feel like I've done nothing but wash dishes and transport people/groceries since I got to Houston. Which, really, is kinda true. This past week I ran errands for mom during the morning, and from three - whenever I had all the siblings, a daily minimum of about three of Nicole's friends who are over to study, and for half the week, Tish at home, fed everyone, made sure no one killed or maimed anyone else, put Emma to bed and made sure Dad got his dinner, etc. Saturday there was less to do. In the evening I lied and said I was going out with Tish and Michael (I had originally planned to do so, but Michael made other plans and I wasn't feeling social anyway) and drove around aimlessly. Today there was church, groceries (We're feeding an average of nine people a day, all good eaters, and we're all very forgetful when shopping. This results in being very well-acquainted with Krogers), and dishes. Dear sweet Jeebus, the dishes. No one did them yesterday when I was out, so it was about 7-9 people's plates, bowls, etc, plus a few that hadn't shown up from the night before, and all the stuff my mom used to cook. For those who have seen our house, it filled (and overflowed) the sink and covered the counter) My hands are like prunes. It feels weird...
This next week... I don't know. I'll probably be dropping off and picking up siblings at various peoples homes tomorrow, and Tuesday I have the same drill as last week. The rest of the week everyone gets out at noon, so I have to be home then. At the end of the week there's graduation and a youth group pool party that we need to clean up and cook for, then clean up after... and Sunday there's the usual church thing. At some point on Sunday, I think, Nicole, David, Gabriel, and my mom are going to Austin to see a concert, so I'll be at home watching Emma and making sure Dad gets fed. After that I get to go back to San Antonio and job-hunt.

Really, though, I shouldn't complain about it. It's not that big a deal... and I did waste a whole fucking semester. I should be kissing my parents' feet for not kicking me out and cutting me off. I don't deserve to have time off to myself after that. I'm just a whiny brat.

I haven't seen Michael since January, and given how the universe dislikes us, I don't think I'll see him again 'til next January. I'm strangely okay with this. How things change.

I'm in an extraordinarily bad mood and it's been getting progressively worse since about Friday. I don't know why. PMS and all related crap is over. I just want to hide and/or kill things.
["I can't get the fucking tree... AUGH! I VILL KILL EVERYONE!"]
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