The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain (jenni_the_odd) wrote,
The Dark-Eyed Mistress of Sweet, Sweet Pain


It's another Lady Gaga-inspired episode. Okay. Born This Way.

  • Brittany, I'm not sure my love for your fashion sense can survive that hat.
  • Lauren's booty-camp dance delights me.
  • Aaaand Rachel's down.
  • Oh, are we gonna get to meet Rachel's dads? No. No, we are not. Why, show? I want to meet them. :(
  • "Well, I'm standing." Hee.
  • "First of all, I like how I look." Liiiiiieeeesss. Rachel, you've bitched constantly about how not-pretty you are. Despite the fact that Lea Michele is gorgeous.
  • "... What does your girlfriend look like?" Fuck you, Dr. Unnecessary Surgery. Fuck you with a rusty rake.
  • "Because, like Medusa, I try to avoid eye contact with her."
  • Poor Sam. We love your lady-lips, Sam. Don't ever change.
  • Artie having his legs removed? An eye de-slanting? Really? What the fuck, Santana. There's being abrasive but loveable, and then there's being a complete asshole, especially given how you've clearly demonstrated in the past that you can dish it out but you can't take it.
  • "Self-hatin' Asian." Oh, Mike.
  • "I'm just trying to mirror what I see in the magazines." Who wrote Tina's dialogue, and from which "How to Understand Your Teen" pamphlet addressed to 50 year-olds was it plagarized?
  • Okay, Santana's still being an utter bitch, but Sam trying to check out Finn's nipples is hilarious, as is Finn swatting him away. Though I don't recall super-puffy nipples on Finn, and we've seen him shirtless. And puffy nipples are adorable, anyway.
  • "If you look in the mirror and you don't like what you see, you should change it." It's become pretty clear through the show's run that Santana has some potentially very serious issues re: body image. (Coach Sue's lemonade cleanse, the boob job, the sexual use of her body not because she enjoys it, but as a weapon or a means of seeking validation from others), and something tells me it's not likely to ever be addressed. Sigh.
  • Wait, Schue, THIS is when you step in? You wait until Santana is done with her tirade designed specifically to hurt and shame your other students? You are the worst teacher.
  • And Emma's the first to say the episode title. Drink!
  • "Their two favorite teachers: Me, and Gaga." This is why American students are falling so far behind.
  • Sam's Sean Connery impression. <3 I love Sam. I love his dorky, dorky face.
  • "I'm a closet lesbian and a judgemental bitch, which means one thing: I have awesome gaydar."
  • Writers, since when does Santana hang out with the other Glee clubbers besides Brittany? She was just insulting them, and no one really seems to like her much. Most likely because most of what comes out of her mouth is hurtful.
  • "A group number by the queen of self-love." ... Cyndi Lauper and "She-bop"? Oh. The other kind of self-love. Gotcha.
  • Hee. Ginger. "Hooray!" Oh, Emma. You are trying so hard not to deal with things.
  • "Not real jewels." Puck... Oh, forget it.
  • Hee, Tiny Lauren and her baby pull-ups!
  • "Baby, you're gonna get that crown." Okay, Puck is an idiot, but I kind of love how he is with Lauren, and how genuinely he seems to care for her. This is also the first instance we've seen of Lauren acknowledging that her size isn't what most would consider attractive, and I do like that it's done not so much as "I wish I was thin" as "I wish society had a wider view of beauty."
  • "I'm surprised more girls haven't asked me; my nose is awesome!" Hah!
  • I really like this mash-up, and it sounds perfectly sad and sweet and lovely. And Lea Michele tends towards dramaface while singing, but her on-the-verge-of-tears look throughout this song is pretty damn heartbreaking.
  • Schuester, two of your students are singing about how they feel bad about themselves, one of them looks like she's about to burst into sobs, and you are grinning and clapping like an idiot. Worst. Teacher. Ever.
  • ... Why are all the fat girls dressed alike? And kind of awfully? Lauren makes up for them in her cool shirt, at least.
  • Geez, Quinn...
  • "That's sort of the idea..."
  • Good lord, Quinn, who pissed in your Bitch Flakes this morning?
  • Lauren seems about as confused by Quinn's sudden mission to destroy her as I am, but I am confident Zizes can handle it.
  • "You really need to be more careful with your leering."
  • Santana's an awful person a lot of the time, but I couldn't help smirking as she laid the smack down on Karofsky, because I hate him even more.
  • "Maybe in junior college." Hee.
  • "Like the Roosevelts." This is what happens when Holly Holiday teaches history.
  • The in-the-locker cam is an interesting directorial choice, and I like it.
  • Oh, so we're going to get Quinn's take on the body image issues, then? 'Kay.
  • All right, I know I give Corey Monteith a lot of shit for his singing and dancing. The show has embraced the dancing, and it's highly entertaining here, and his voice suits this song quite well. The song itself suits him, as well; he's always been the person who could have abandoned glee club and everything associated with it and not suffered, and he has instead lead the charge for the popular kids to join the gleeks.
  • "But I'm getting better, right?" Crickets. Hah!
  • "That's all any of us have been talking about." I love the glee gossip machine.
  • Tina's gonna be a new Asian sex symbol? Does... does this mean Jenna Ushkowitz in hot goth wear? Hooray!
  • Aww, Mike and Tina. Makeouts are for after school, dears.
  • Oh, Quinn's face when Finn tells Rachel she's beautiful. Aww. Nice job by Dianna Agron; you practically feel your own stomach drop in sympathy.
  • "Rachel Berry is getting a nose job." :(
  • "... because you function so well and you're so cute about it." I'm not sure we can call what Emma does "functioning so well."
  • "You are an expert at deflection." "Is that a new shirt?" Well played, Pillsbury.
  • Yeah, no one can really blame the glee kids for not trusting Karofsky.
  • "Wait... Santana?" Quinn's got a point; Santana's almost as much a bully as Karofsky, and mostly gets away with it because she's not phsyically throwing people around most of the time.
  • "I'm gonna barf." Best move quick, Tina, I think Puck's beat you to it. Hee, Mark Salling's face!
  • Meathead, why do you want the kid's pants? I mean, as bullying tactics go, it's... a little more interesting than shoving someone in a locker, I guess?
  • I love Protective Daddy Burt. He is the Best Dad.
  • "The bullying stopped because your top offender stopped." Truefax.
  • I will be very interested to see how Karofsky's dad handles the inevitably-coming revelation that his kid is gay.
  • Oh, Kurt. Kurt and your vest. And your little red bow tie. Never put on an ugly Dalton blazer again, please.
  • Much as I hate Karofsky, this is some nice work by Max Adler.
  • "Okay, if you're gonna be gay, you simply must know who that is." Hee.
  • Careful, Karofsky. You raise your voice or move too fast towards Kurt and I am 90% sure Burt will just leap right through the window and destroy you.
  • Yay, PFLAG chapter!
  • I love Protective Brother Finn, too.
  • "I checked through the peephole I drilled last year." ...
  • I also kind of love that Puck, despite all his awfulness, is also the most religiously open glee clubber and seems to take his faith very seriously.
  • "Kurt Hummel's back at McKinley!" With a fabulous top hat and a jacket full of hardware! And a tie made of keys. Naturally.
  • Awww, Surprise Warblers! Though I do question what the hell they're doing at another school during the middle of a weekday. Don't they hold classes at Dalton?
  • Oh, so Guitar Kid just happened to be hanging around? Also with a piano? And... a full string section? What is. I don't. What. Oh, show. I give up, I'm just gonna focus on Harry Freakin' Potter's Emotion-Face and how this song is very sweet. And how the Warblers just strut into this strange school like total badasses, because fuck you, singing is awesome.
  • Editing flub! We see Brittany walk down the same step twice, then the camera pulls back to show her in a new spot entirely. Come on, show, don't get sloppy on me.
  • Awww, the hugs and handshakes. Ohh, the Finn-hug. I got teary-eyed there, no lie. I love Kurt and Finn so much as brothers; I think that dynamic works so well for them.
  • I like to think the theater kids hang out, making slowly moving scenery all the time, and have learned to ignore the creepy glee kids who keep showing up, traipsing around their sets, singing about love or friendship or whatever.
  • Aww, everyone is happy. And yay, Kurt-song. Chris Colfer's gonna pretty much own Broadway someday, for reals. He's tied with Naya Rivera for my favorite voice on Glee, and Kurt is tied with Brittany for my favorite glee fashion icon.
  • "I don't remember doing half this stuff!" Hah.
  • Oh, so this is why Quinn's all batshit? She used to be fat and had a bigger nose.
  • Who gives an 11 year-old a nose job.
  • This is both the most annoying sound in the world and very good "prelude to a complete panicky meltdown" music.
  • "Is there a sale at Claires?" Hah.
  • Kurt, I love your hat, but that vest looks like you fell into a craft store during the summer and had to knit your way out.
  • "Is she here?" "... This is a mall in Ohio."
  • What the shit is this. I don't even. What. The hell is this song, I have no--
  • Hahahaha, Puck jamming out by the speakers! Fine. Fine.
  • Glee sure does love its mall flash mobs, doesn't it?
  • Okay, the song is kind of obnoxious and they've already done the flash-mob-dance-in-a-mall thing (though the other one was a fantasy sequence back in season 1), but I do love how genuinely happy Rachel looks throughout the whole thing. Everyone looks like they're having a good, goofy time, really.
  • HAH, Kurt and Puck!
  • I have such a soft spot for people being ridiculous. Very well, show. You win this round.
  • AUGH until Kurt booped Rachel on her freshly-broken nose. Jesus, Kurt, just because the bandage is off doesn't mean it's free for handling! D:
  • Oh thank god, Emma's visiting an actual shrink instead of trying to work through it with Dr. Schuester's Sexy Song Therapy.
  • Nice job, show, of addressing the idea that people with mental illness aren't defined by that illness, nor are mental illnesses a sign of weakness or of not trying hard enough.
  • I kind of hope we see more of Emma's shrink-lady. I like her and her soothing voice.
  • See, I like this Finn. He's not too bright, but he's earnest and he's sweet and he's not being a giant hypocrite or trying to manipulate people. Where has this Finn been for the past couple storylines?
  • Okay, so what Lauren did wasn't cool and bordered on the awfulness that other students (including Quinn) have inflicted on the less-popular glee clubbers. However, unlike, say, Santana, or an unthreatened Karofsky, she admitted of her own volition that what she did was wrong. I gotta respect that.
  • Also, Lauren's shirt/lipstick/hair combo is awesome.
  • "I'm Hispanic." HAH, "Lebanese."
  • "Clearly you don't love you as much as I do, or you'd put the shirt on and dance with me." Brit-Brit. :(
  • "Butt Chin." Because they couldn't fit "Worst Teacher Ever" on a shirt.
  • "Eh, he can have her." It's okay, Sam, I still love you.
  • I... I'm not the only one who think Kurt looks really fucking hot in this dance number, am I? 'Cause, yeah. The creepy Gaga movements really work for Chris Colfer, as does the "LIKES BOYS" shirt. Yum.
  • Okay, I love the idea of the shirts (I have a tremendous love for "fuck you" fashion choices), but I'm not clear on Mercedes' shirt. She... doesn't like that she doesn't have a weave? I know she yelled "MY WEAVE" when there was a risk of slushying in a previous episode (can't recall which one), but that was ad-libbed, and she might have all-natural hair now. I know there's a lot of issues surrounding hair for women of color. I guess it might make more sense if, you know, Mercedes was given any sort of character development this season. :(
  • Also, aww, Sam's Trouty Mouth shirt. <3 And hah, Puck's shirt and the downward-pointing arrow.
  • You know, I wasn't a big fan of this song when I first heard it; besides the questionable racial issues in the lyrics it mostly sounded like someone tossed "Express Yourself" in a blender and pushed the button that said "Theme Song to Next Season of RuPaul's Drag Race" (it's right between "liquify" and "crush"; look for it). Poptastic, as is Gaga's forte, but nothing too special. But as with most Lady Gaga songs, it's catchy as all everloving fuck, and I keep hearing it, and it has grown on me like a glitter-encrusted cancer. Plus, anything I get to listen to while watching Heather Morris dance is going to be immediately improved.
  • Oh, Santana. What catches my eye more, though, is the tormented, terrified, and desperately longing look on Karofsky's face. Again, good job by Max Adler.
  • I will be very interested to see what Emma is like at a lower anxiety level.
  • This was a Sue-less episode that, I felt, didn't suffer for it. Jane Lynch is hilarious, but Sue as a character is getting played out. She's too often used as an excuse by the writers--"Sue is crazy!" has become the "A wizard did it" of Glee and it's a cheap ploy no matter how much hilarity ensues.
  • Also, the glee club is no closer to Nationals than they were... a month ago? So I am guessing the writers are gonna have to cram some sort of bizarre fundraising in pretty soon, because as I recall, they can currently afford half of one ticket to New York.

    This entry was originally posted at You can comment here or there; it matters only that you comment PLEASE I NEED THE ATTENTION OH GOD PLEASE LOVE ME *SOB*.
  • Tags: glee

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